RT: @fatbellybella

When we operate with in any relationship with good intent and try hardest to learn ourselves, flaws & all, we begin to not blame anyone outside of ourselves, but to realize that we have attracted a certain partner only to achieve a lesson. The lesson usually reveals something about ourselves that we've tried to avoid (relationship after relationship) by blaming others. These lessons do not discriminate between gender, nor is your mate doing something "to you". He/ she is experiencing their own patterns. In essence, maybe we should pay more attention to our patterns of being victims or hurting others and get to the core of the thing. The mate you attract/attracted was designed specifically for you. He/she will bring all good and bad things you are to surface.

The previous paragraph is composed of tweets from @fatbellybella, also known as Erykah Badu. Its the answer to a question I've been thinking about all week. Mercury is in retrograde and some old feelings reared their ugly heads. They're feelings I hid somewhere and couldn't seem to find them until recently. I was actually ''fine'' until this recent cosmic event. These old feelings eventually allowed me to correspond with a person from the past. We shared time and space, briefly. It ended because he was also sharing his time and space with others, simultaneously. 

I thought, how could someone do this to another person they claim to love? But then I read, "nor is your mate doing something "to you". He/ she is experiencing their own patterns." It made complete sense. I attracted this particular person to learn a particular lesson about myself. He attracted me as well. 

I realized, this person was simply doing what he does. He was experiencing his own pattern. I was as well. While acting out our own patterns, our paths happened to cross and the patterns continued. I think many of us want to be the person that causes the other to end their painful patterns. When we don't, we think we failed. We take it personally and ask ourselves ridiculous questions that have no relation or effect on the outcome. I know why I attracted this person into my own experience, he mirrors someone else in my life. I learned a great deal in the process. Sometimes learning isn't easy or free of pain. However, learning is about perspective and honoring the knowledge you receive. I don't think any amount of words, paragraphs, sonnets, monologues, or even dialogue will help my past partner understand or realize how his pattern affected me. After all, they are his patterns and they seem to work for him. I've also come to realize that making another "realize" is not my job. I am to understand how the lesson relates to me, what it shows me, and how I can avoid repeating it. 

Realizing this brings clarity. It helped me understand that this person does what he does, I just happened to be someone he did his behavior/pattern to. In this space in time, I strive to learn the complete lesson so that my pattern ends and my path only attracts certain people, free of certain patterns.